Someone urged me to get married and I agreed to do so, only for my partner to turn around and betray me.
China's digital arena has recently been buzzing with comments, debates, and frank reflections on the evolving perceptions of marriage and child-rearing. These discussions, mostly seen on the popular microblogging platform, Weibo, present a riveting narrative of the socio-cultural shifts within China.

26 June 2023
An intriguing proposal for a 'new-type marriage model' has been floating around Weibo. This alternative structure suggests: 1) no bride price from the groom, no dowry from the bride; 2) marrying legally but not holding a ceremony; 3) the cost of buying a house or car is split equally between the man and woman; 4) if they have two children, one will take the father's surname, the other the mother's; 5) all living expenses are split (AA system); 6) each partner supports their own parents; 7) not living with either partner's parents; 8) returning to their respective homes during holidays.
Weibo users have shown mixed reactions to this proposal. While some embrace it as a progressive step towards gender equality and independence from conventional norms, others express skepticism or opposition, considering it as a deviation from deeply embedded traditional values.
One user commented, "Marriage is for happiness, and so is not marrying. As long as you are happy. Best wishes for all married and single people to be happy." This sentiment captures the core of those advocating for individual choice and personal fulfillment over societal pressure and conventional norms.
In contrast, some users question the feasibility and validity of such a model. One netizen pointed out, "Who besides your parents would advise you to get married? Others are just making polite conversation, don't take it seriously." This implies a degree of skepticism towards the idea that societal pressure to marry is widespread and intense.
Intertwined with these debates are also anecdotes of single women enjoying their independence and freedom. Stories of unmarried women indulging in self-care, travel, and luxurious holidays without the constraint of family responsibilities underscore the growing acceptance of unmarried or single life as a viable lifestyle choice. "I and my cousin are both unmarried women who don't mind spending money on ourselves," shared a Weibo user, narrating their indulgent travels and shopping sprees, which drew both admiration and envy from others.
However, the discussions also point towards a deep-rooted concern about China's population. Given China's large population base of 1.4 billion, a sarcastic comment highlighted the irony of worrying about extinction, arguably hinting at China's recent easing of its one-child policy and promoting procreation.
Controversially, several comments criticize the perceived societal obsession with marriage and childbearing. "I really don't understand why so many people like to advise others to get married and have children. It's really incomprehensible," remarked a user, reflecting the sentiment of many who feel pressured by societal norms.
These debates, varied in their sentiments, underline the changing perceptions of marriage, childbearing, and individual freedoms in China. While the tussle between tradition and modernity continues, the social media conversation has indeed offered a unique window into China's evolving socio-cultural landscape. As one netizen aptly summed up, "If you like it, marry several times yourself. Don't force others. You're miserable in your own life, yet you advise others. That's really deadly."
The explosion of these discussions not only underscores the ongoing societal transformation in China but also signifies the rise of individualism against the backdrop of traditional expectations and norms. It brings to light the continuing search for balance between personal happiness, societal duties, and cultural norms in today's China.
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